Quote by Ford Prefect

"I may be a sorry case, but I don't write jokes in base thirteen."

"You know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris?"

"The answer is a towel."

"Exactly! Between you, me, and that spoon, it's completely governed by the Government!"

"Education opens doors."

"Education opens doors to endless possibilities."

"I ain't got the education you got, bub."

"You can't put a price on history."