Quote by David Letterman
"Here's a little tip: never give your wife a household appliance as a gift."
More from David Letterman
"I think it's nice when people use your name when they're greeting you. It makes you feel like more than just a guy."
"The difference between me and my competition is that I'm awake."
"You know, it's hard to beat a person at anything unless they want to lose."
"If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to."