Bob Hope

"I love the military. I do love going and visiting with them and supporting them."

"The most fun part of being married to me is that I never come home."

"I've got to keep breathing. It'll be the first thing I'll have to do in the morning, I suppose."

"Age is not a number, it's a feeling."

"You don't stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing."

"I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of old ones."

"I've been touring for many years and I always make time for my hobbies - golf and more golf."

"The mind is a wonderful thing to waste."

"I'm like a fireman when it comes to answering requests."

"Laughter is the best medicine, but if you laugh for no reason, you need medicine."

"What makes life interesting is that nobody knows what's coming next."

"My father told me all businessmen were sons of bitches. But I never believed him till now."

"The secret to staying young is to find a cure for old age."

"I think that one of the greatest things about being a performer is the privilege of being allowed to entertain people."

"I feel that you are as good as the company you keep."

"Thank God I'm Jewish - I got the genes right."

"You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake."

"I always try to tell the truth. Sometimes I tell a lie."

"A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink."

"I haven't slept in years, because of my mattress, but that's not the real reason - it's the coffee table I'm sleeping on."

"The most important thing in any relationship is honesty."

"Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I'm sixty-five, I'll still be working."

"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf."

"I've got to keep moving, keep traveling, keep performing."

"Life is a funny thing - the moment you think you've got it all figured out, it changes on you."

"I'm so old, I remember when the Dead Sea was only sick."

"The road to success is always under construction."

"I'm blessed to have such a wonderful family and friends who support me."

"Every day is a gift, that's why it's called the present."

"The greatest achievement is to outlive your money."