Johnny Carson

"Comedians are interesting people. My parents were teachers."

"Never do a love scene with more than three takes, baby."

"I wake up every morning and make my choice to be happy."

"The difference between Las Vegas and Atlantic City is that one is a nice place to visit, and the other is where your wife is."

"Talent is a wonderful thing, but it won't carry a quitter."

"If you want to discover riches, look within yourself."

"Doing the same thing over and over again is the definition of insanity."

"I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it."

"Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get."

"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get."

"The most important thing in life is the people we love."

"Don't be afraid to fail. That's how you learn."

"I hated school. Even to this day, when I pass by a school, I get a yucky feeling."

"The instrument that really does create false perceptions is television."

"Opportunity knocks softly. You have to be listening."

"There's nothing sadder than a little boy looking at his father knowing his father doesn't like him."

"The only thing that matters in this world is what you do NOW."

"If you believe in yourself and have dedication and pride, you can do anything."

"Never say never. Never is a long time."

"I really don't think I'm qualified to be anybody's life coach."

"The Carson Show is a show of soft entertainment."

"If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done."

"Kids today are smarter than we ever were."

"You know what's interesting about Washington? It's the kind of place where the truth takes a back seat to perception."

"Entertainment is a great way to educate without people realizing they're being educated."

"The minute you start feeling like you've made it, you're done."

"I'm an entertainer. I try to give people what they want."

"Life is full of surprises and seizing opportunities."

"I believe in second chances, but I don't believe in third chances."

"You can't please everybody, but you can try."