Lenny Bruce

"I think it's about time we gave up religion and got back to God."

"The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it."

"There are no obscene thoughts, only obscene little words."

"If you believe in God, He will believe in you."

"The role of a comedian is to make people laugh, at minimum."

"I'm not a comedian. I'm Lenny Bruce."

"Take away the rhetoric, and what's left is the truth."

"You can't do anything about the past, except learn from it."

"The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them."

"My mother-in-law broke up my family."

"Communism is like one big phone company."

"Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence."

"The real obscenity is in the system."

"Comedy is medicine."

"If you swing at strikes, they don't hit you."

"The role of the artist is to disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed."

"It hurts to be alive and to see waste."

"All my humor is based on destruction and despair."

"The only bit of advice I would give to my kid is, 'It's a tough world; coffee helps.'"

"The objective of comedy is to ring the bell of truth."

"Selling pot should be no different than selling alcohol."

"In the Halls of Justice, the only justice is in the halls."

"I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner."

"Obscenity is not in the word; it's in the mind."

"The suppression of truth is not the answer to anything."

"Laughter is the only catharsis."

"I'm dying in front of you."

"The more you own, the more it owns you."

"What is truth today becomes tomorrow's lie."

"Freedom is the ability to expose yourself to the other side."