Stephen Colbert

"Courage is acting despite the fear, not the absence of fear."

"The secret to happiness is having a purpose."

"You can't teach an old dog new tricks, but I'm not an old dog."

"I believe that education is the most powerful weapon we can use to change the world."

"The future is now, or at least it will be in a few minutes."

"I don't think you can fake your way to authenticity."

"My mother always said I was a late bloomer."

"The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now."

"I learned long ago never to wrestle with a pig: you both get dirty, and the pig likes it."

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts."

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

"I'm a big believer in the power of positive thinking."

"Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans."

"Love is patient, love is kind, and love doesn't hurt."

"A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you."

"Family is not always blood. It's the people in your life who want you in theirs."

"Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul."

"The only way to do great work is to love what you do."

"Innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower."

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams."

"In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity."

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."

"The unexamined life is not worth living."

"To be or not to be is not the question anymore."

"I think therefore I ham."

"The pen is mightier than the sword, but the sword is mightier than the keyboard."

"Music is the universal language of mankind."

"Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life."

"Science is not a democracy."

"History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon."