I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high-functioning sociopath. - Mac

"I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high-functioning sociopath."

Mac

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"I am a five-star man, and I deserve a five-star woman."

"You know what it is, bitch? A system of pipes."

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"When I'm dead, inside or out, that's when you'll know I'm gone."