Quote by Peter Kay

"You know what really grinds my gears? People who say 'no offense' and then say something really offensive."

"I'm not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are."

"The way to a man's heart is through his stomach, or so they say. Personally, I find going through the ribcage works just fine."

"I've got a bad back. It's not a bad back, it's just a back that's bad at being a back."

"You can't expect to be happy if you're surrounded by mess."

"Health and happiness - these are true wealth"

"How can you live like this? It's like a pigsty!"

"You're going to get sick living like this."