Quote by George Lopez

"I'm not a politician, I'm a comedian, but I play politicians on TV"

"You know what's funny about making jokes? If they don't work, you can always say you were just kidding"

"Life is like a box of chocolates, except I ate all of mine already"

"The difference between me and other comedians is that I actually live the stories I tell"

"I've seen a lot of things in my time."

"That's how we archaeologists tell time."

"We must learn from history or be doomed to repeat it."

"Every artifact tells a story."