I've learned that you should never talk to your mother about... - Phyllis Diller

"I've learned that you should never talk to your mother about your father's girlfriend."

Phyllis Diller Wisdom

Stand-up Comedian American 1917–2012

More from Phyllis Diller

"A smile is a facelift that's in everyone's price range."

"I wanted my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Now I'm broke."

"Housework can't kill you, but why take the chance?"

"Old age ain't no place for sissies."

"I'm not angry, I'm just disappointed."

"The best things in life are free."

"You can't have everything in life, but you can have what matters most."

"A woman's intuition is rarely wrong."