I've always said that if I had to choose between my wife and... - W.C. Fields

"I've always said that if I had to choose between my wife and my dog, I'd miss my dog."

W.C. Fields Humor

Comedian Actor American 1880–1946

More from W.C. Fields

"I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally."

"Start every day off with a smile and get it over with."

"Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad."

"The most important thing in life is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made."

"Never underestimate the power of a good laugh."

"Laughter is the best medicine."

"A good laugh is the best medicine."

"Laughter is contagious and wonderful."