Andy Rooney

"I don't like food that's too pretty. It's like eating a decoration."

"The things that are most obvious are the things we see least."

"I'd like to see a future where people believe science."

"It's not whether you win or lose, it's whether you win or lose the things that matter."

"We have more and more ways to communicate with each other, yet less and less to say."

"I'm happy when I'm doing things. Not when I'm sitting around thinking about doing things."

"Nothing is more important than good health."

"Guns don't kill people; people kill people, but people with guns kill more of them."

"There's nothing people like better than being told what they already believe."

"Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when he is driven to speak by something outside himself."

"The best part about being my age is I don't have to pretend I know what's going on."

"We're given just enough time to make a mess of things, but not enough time to fix them."

"Art should disturb you, not comfort you."

"I don't think there's anything unique about me, which is probably what makes me unique."

"The average American is just like everyone else, except different."

"I've learned that you should never get rid of anything you don't understand."

"Some of the world's greatest feats have been accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible."

"If you don't know how much money you have, you're probably rich."

"Everyone wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die."

"The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept."

"I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope for the best."

"There's a very fine line between the word 'spiritual' and the word 'gullible'."

"We live in a fantasy world where honesty is brutally punished and beauty is richly rewarded."

"Nothing you see on the internet is true, no matter how many pictures it has."

"The kind of world we have depends on the kind of people we are."

"I'm interested in the fact that less and less of what matters is being said."

"Most of us are about as eager to be changed as we would be to be told we're totally wrong."

"A person is smart. People are dumb."

"I'd like to be remembered as someone who brightened the day of a few people."

"Getting older is not for the faint of heart."