Coach McGuirk

"Gratitude is appreciating what you have before losing it."

"Creativity requires alcohol and desperation."

"Justice is a concept, not a reality."

"Patience is a virtue I don't possess."

"Kindness is wasted on most people."

"Strength is often just stubbornness."

"Fear keeps you alive, mostly."

"Power is what everyone wants and nobody admits to wanting."

"Money is the root of all solutions."

"Health is wealth, but beer tastes better."

"Adventure is just bad luck with better stories."

"Imagination beats reality every time."

"Technology is making life harder while pretending to help."

"History shows we never learn."

"Philosophy is thoughts that don't pay rent."

"Literature is emotions on paper."

"Politics is the art of lying convincingly."

"War settles nothing except who dies."

"Motivation is just fear of failure."

"Inspiration is rare and when it comes, you should take notes."

"Relationships are just agreements not to be alone together."

"Solitude is peaceful until you remember why you're alone."

"Look, I'm not saying I'm a great coach, but I show up and that's half the battle right there."

"You kids are gonna learn that life isn't fair, and the sooner you accept that, the better off you'll be."

"I've made a lot of mistakes, but at least I owned up to 'em. Sort of."

"Soccer's just a game, but losing still stinks."

"Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do, even if you don't wanna do it."

"I'm not the smartest guy, but I know how to handle myself."

"You can't win 'em all, but you can try not to lose 'em all."

"Life's tough, kid. Get used to it now while you're young."