Gilbert Gottfried

"Patience is the art of waiting without complaining—good luck with that."

"Kindness is the only currency that never depreciates."

"Strength is admitting you need help and asking for it."

"Fear is temporary; regret is forever."

"Power without accountability is just bullying on a larger scale."

"Money follows happiness, not the other way around."

"Health is wealth, but wealth isn't health."

"Adventure requires leaving your comfort zone and your insurance policy."

"Imagination is humanity's greatest achievement and curse."

"Technology connects us while isolating us—choose your poison."

"History repeats itself because nobody pays attention the first time."

"Philosophy is thinking about nothing until your head hurts."

"Literature is the proof that other people feel the same way you do."

"Politics proves that democracy is messy but necessary."

"War is what happens when people stop listening to each other."

"Motivation is temporary, but discipline is forever."

"Inspiration is the universe whispering that you're on the right track."

"Relationships are where you discover who you really are—and it's not always pleasant."

"Solitude teaches you that you're the only company you really need."

"I'm not afraid of death; I'm afraid of not having lived."

"The best comedy comes from truth, no matter how uncomfortable that truth might be."

"You have to find humor in the darkest places, or you'll go mad."

"Life is too short to take seriously all the time."

"Success means nothing if you've lost yourself in the process."

"Real friends are the ones who laugh at your worst jokes."

"Family doesn't have to be perfect; it just has to be yours."

"Hope is what keeps us screaming into the void."

"Courage isn't the absence of fear; it's doing it anyway while terrified."

"Change is inevitable, but growth is optional."

"Education is the weapon against ignorance and apathy."