Jack Benny

"The adventure of life is to learn."

"Imagination is more important than knowledge."

"Technology is best when it brings people together."

"History is written by the victors."

"Philosophy teaches us to question everything."

"Literature opens doors to other worlds."

"The only certainty in politics is change."

"In war, truth is the first casualty."

"Motivation is what gets you started; habit is what keeps you going."

"The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it."

"In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take."

"A good relationship is about balance, not perfection."

"Sometimes you need to stand alone to know you're standing strong."

"The best way to predict the future is to create it."

"I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis, and I don't deserve that either."

"The secret of my success is that I bit off more than I could chew and chewed as fast as I could."

"If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people."

"My manner of living is plain and I don't mean to change it."

"Time is what keeps everything from happening at once."

"You can't buy happiness, but you can buy a violin and that's pretty much the same thing."

"I would not do Cwm without an audible laugh somewhere."

"The only thing that matters in life is your personal integrity and how you treat others."

"A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles."

"The most important thing in life is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made."

"Give me my privacy, and nobody will ever have to know that I'm stingy."

"I would rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are."

"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing; if you can fake those, you've got it made."

"Well, I'm like the scotch whisky—I improve with age."

"I grew up watching my mother struggle, and that taught me the value of hard work."

"Laughter is the best medicine—though I'd still see a doctor if I were you."