Jackie Burkhart

"Ugh, like, why do I even bother trying? Nobody appreciates real beauty anyway."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy really cute shoes, which is basically the same thing."

"Being popular is a full-time job, and honey, I'm very dedicated to my career."

"If you're not the most fabulous person in the room, you're doing it wrong."

"Life is too short to wear boring clothes or date boring boys."

"I don't follow trends, I AM the trend."

"A girl's got to have her priorities straight: shopping first, everything else later."

"My hair didn't cost this much to look like yesterday's news."

"True friends are the ones who tell you when your outfit is tragic."

"Love is wonderful, but have you ever had the perfect outfit?"

"I deserve the best because I am the best."

"Change is good, as long as it doesn't affect my wardrobe."

"Wisdom is knowing when to compromise—like choosing between two amazing shoes."

"The road to success is paved with good intentions and great hair products."

"Happiness isn't a destination, it's a really good day at the mall."

"Family means they have to love you, even when you're a total diva."

"Hope is believing that tomorrow's sales will be better than today's."

"Courage is wearing white after Labor Day when you know you can pull it off."

"Education is important, but looking educated is even more important."

"Knowledge is power, and looking like you have power is just as good."

"Time flies when you're shopping, which is why I do it constantly."

"The truth is, nobody looks better than me in pink."

"Freedom means never having to say you're sorry for being fabulous."

"Peace comes from knowing your outfit is on point."

"Nature is beautiful, but not as beautiful as a perfectly applied makeup look."

"Art is subjective, but my taste is objectively flawless."

"Music is great, but have you heard the sound of a shopping bag opening?"

"Faith means believing that everything will work out as long as it's fabulous."

"A real leader knows how to delegate—like telling someone else to carry her bags."

"Work hard so you can afford the things that really matter in life."