"If money can't buy happiness, it should at least buy solitude."Money
"Health is just a slow death with better insurance."Health
"Adventure ruins perfectly good afternoons."Adventure
"Imagination is what makes people unbearable."Imagination
"Technology and SpongeBob: the twin scourges of my existence."Technology
"History is humanity's greatest waste of time."History
"Philosophy: thinking deeply about terrible things."Philosophy
"Literature is superior, unlike everyone in my life."Literature
"Politicians and starfish: nature's most pathetic creatures."Politics
"War would be less offensive than this job."War
"The only thing I'm motivated to do is leave."Motivation
"I'm inspired only by the prospect of solitude."Inspiration
"Relationships require vulnerability, which I'll never provide."Relationships