Tai Frasier

"As if anyone could ignore the sounds of my genius"

"I've never been with a boy who has a tongue piercing before"

"Your heart is noble but you're just too tall"

"Get off my jock"

"Ugh, as if I would ever date a high school boy"

"The key to a great party is good food and bad decisions"

"I actually wouldn't mind being reincarnated as my son"

"Being a teenager is so complicated"

"You're sweet, but you're not in any position to get with a real woman"

"My Beverly Hills psychiatrist told me I can achieve anything I want"

"She doesn't even go here"

"I was surfing the world wide web before the internet even existed"

"Commitment is such a weight to carry on your shoulders"

"It's all about the hair flip"

"I'm an addict. I need it. I'm dying without it"

"You know I've always been daddy's girl"

"He's like a human Golden Retriever"

"I really do think that people are capable of change"

"The universe is really trying to tell me something right now"

"Fashion is not about comfort, it's about aesthetics"

"My manual says I shouldn't"

"I'm going to be a matchmaker like Oprah but with better shoes"

"Dionne, our life is not a movie, even though sometimes it feels like one"

"I think I should just stay single and celebrate my heterosexuality"

"Everything is a phase for you. You're very emotional"

"I need to find myself a new passion project"

"Don't harsh my mellow with your negativity"

"You're either gonna like me or you're not, but I'm amazing either way"

"I mean, we could all go crazy and like, actually read the material"

"Nobody respects you when you're a child molester"