The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy

"Change is inevitable, and it's always for the worse."

"Courage is just another word for reckless stupidity."

"Hope is the cruelest emotion of them all."

"Success means nothing when you're doomed to eternal servitude."

"The truth is often disappointing and usually painful."

"Friendship is just a slow form of betrayal."

"Death is the only certainty in life, and I should know."

"Love is for the weak-minded and the foolish."

"Happiness is just a word people use to describe the absence of misery."

"The only thing worse than being dead is being alive."

"I'm a skeleton. I don't have feelings. Well, I do, but they're all terrible."

"Talent is 10% inspiration and 90% willingness to destroy the competition."

"Faith in yourself is the only faith that matters."

"Music is nice, but silence is golden when people are afraid."

"Technology is just another tool for domination."

"War is peace when you're winning."

"Politics is just manipulation with better PR."

"Education teaches you to follow rules; I teach you to break them."

"Hope is what fools have before reality hits them."

"Solitude is where I do my best plotting."

"Relationships are just alliances until they're not useful anymore."

"Inspiration usually strikes just before I do."

"Motivation comes from wanting something badly enough."

"Philosophy is just expensive thinking."

"History is written by the victorious, and I plan to be one."

"Imagination is how I plan my next conquest."

"Adventure is just another word for 'things going wrong'."

"Health is important only if you need it to achieve your goals."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it buys everything else."

"The only thing to fear is failure."