Charlie Kelly

"We're gonna win this, no matter what"

"I am the trash man! I come out, I throw trash all over the ring, and then I start eating garbage!"

"Charlie work is the best work because it's honest work."

"I don't believe in making plans. Plans are a waste of time."

"The Gang gets extreme, and I'm the most extreme of all."

"I'm not illiterate, I just don't like to read."

"Cats in the cradle, man. It's all about cats in the cradle."

"I'm the king of the rats! I'm the one who wins!"

"You gotta admit, that's pretty badass."

"I'm gonna stay inside and practice my karate."

"Artie, Artie Lange would never do this to me."

"I don't need your pity - I'll survive on my own."

"The waitress doesn't know what she's missing."

"I found a dead body! This is the best day ever!"

"Sweet Dee, you're a bird."

"I've been saving my money, and I'm gonna buy the bar."

"You can't just make people not be scared by being louder."

"I love the smell of desperation in the morning."

"Sometimes you gotta take a step back and ask yourself what you're doing."

"I am running away from my responsibilities and it feels great."

"The D.E.N.N.I.S. System is flawless."

"Pepe Silvia! Pepe Silvia! If I just focus on that one thing, everything else makes sense."

"I'm gonna get in that dumpster and I'm gonna find proof!"

"It's always sunny in Philadelphia."

"I don't need your pity. I'm a five-star man."

"The Gang Gives Back - and we don't actually give back."

"I have a system, and the system works."

"Frank is the best dad ever, even though he's terrible."

"I'm gonna drink more and think less about it."

"You can't make friends with salad."