Herb Kazzaz

"Work is what you do to afford the things you don't have time to enjoy."

"Dreams are just lies your brain tells you when you're asleep."

"Beauty fades, but mediocrity is forever."

"Death is the only guarantee we have, besides taxes and being forgotten."

"Perseverance is just stubbornness with better PR."

"Gratitude is what you feel when things aren't as bad as they could be."

"Creativity is 10% inspiration and 90% theft from better artists."

"Justice is whatever the guy with more money wants it to be."

"Patience is for people who don't have anything better to do."

"Kindness is a nice gesture that nobody remembers."

"Strength is pretending you're fine when you're falling apart."

"Fear is just respect with better marketing."

"Power corrupts, which is why I've stayed pretty decent—no power."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it buys a good illusion of it."

"Health is what you have before someone tells you what's wrong."

"Adventure is just getting lost with confidence."

"Imagination is what keeps you from accepting reality."

"Technology makes life easier, which is why I'm more miserable than ever."

"History is written by the winners, and I've never been a winner."

"Philosophy is just expensive thinking."

"Literature teaches you nothing practical, which is why I never read."

"Politics is a dirty game, but at least it's entertainment."

"War is what happens when people stop pretending to like each other."

"Motivation is temporary, just like my marriages."

"Inspiration is what strikes people who don't need to work for a living."

"Relationships are just two people agreeing to disappoint each other."

"Solitude is the only honest company I've ever kept."

"The key to a good life is low expectations and high alcohol tolerance."

"Love at first sight is just lust before reality sets in."

"Wisdom is just mistakes you've made so many times they feel intentional."