Lily Tomlin

"Death is the only thing that brings life into perspective."

"What if you were bound and determined to succeed?"

"I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens."

"The beauty of life is in the small moments, the quiet moments."

"Words are a wonderful commodity. They're cheap and plentiful."

"I was willing to try new things, to be bold, to be wrong."

"The world would be a lot better if more people would just listen."

"I try to make my life a little less predictable, a little more magical."

"Justice is not about revenge; it's about restoration."

"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat."

"I try to be cynical, but it all comes out as pure idealism."

"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain."

"Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination."

"I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be thinking up something else."

"We're all in this together, by ourselves."

"The secret to staying young is to lie about your age."

"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific."

"Don't be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity missed by someone else."

"The human mind is kind of like a condom—it goes from making absolute sense to protecting you from making mistakes, all depending on how you use it."

"If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane."

"One thing I always think about is that my life hasn't been just about comedy—it's been about creating my own path."

"What if there were no hypothetical questions?"

"I think a good relationship is about compromise; I compromise, and my partner does what I want."

"Reality is just a crutch for people who can't handle drugs."

"Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past."

"The number one cause of divorce is marriage."

"I have always wanted to be somebody, but I see now I should have been more specific."

"Why is it that when we talk to God we're said to be praying, but when God talks to us we're schizophrenic?"

"Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, and honest. It's the other lousy 2 percent that get all the publicity."

"My biggest regret is not spending enough time with my family when they were alive."