Sideshow Bob

"Dignity is what I maintain despite the degradation around me."

"The pursuit of perfection is noble, even if futile."

"Good taste is rare, uncommon, and utterly wasted on the masses."

"My celmate was a fascinating conversationalist before he expired."

"Though they laugh at me, I persist in my endeavors."

"My mother never understood me, and perhaps that was for the best."

"Laughter at one's expense is still laughter."

"The pen is mightier than the sword, though both have their uses."

"I have evolved beyond such primitive emotions as hatred."

"Television is both the source of my anguish and my reason to endure."

"Escape from prison is merely a temporary setback in one's plans."

"Footlights and greasepaint cannot hide the emptiness within."

"I am a man of refined sensibilities in a world of Neanderthals."

"Fear is a tool used by the incompetent to control others."

"My obsession with Homer Simpson defines me more than I care to admit."

"Television has made monsters of us all."

"In another life, perhaps I could have been great."

"The theatre, television, and revenge form the holy trinity of purpose."

"I never stay incarcerated for long, you see."

"Society brands me monster, yet I am simply misunderstood."

"My elaborate plans are works of art unto themselves."

"Time in prison has only sharpened my intellect."

"The Springfield Gorge incident was merely a stepping stone."

"I do not seek mere revenge; I seek acknowledgment."

"My intelligence is both my greatest asset and my deepest curse."

"Homer Simpson exists in a state of blissful ignorance."

"To understand me is to understand the depths of the human psyche."

"I have no friends, only accomplices and adversaries."

"My British accent denotes a superiority most will never attain."

"The truth is, I am far more interesting than my pursuers."