Sideshow Bob

"Society creates its own monsters through rejection and humiliation."

"One cannot escape one's nature, no matter how far one travels."

"The truly refined criminal possesses both taste and moral flexibility."

"Escape is always possible for those with sufficient cunning and resources."

"The world offers endless opportunities to those brave enough to seize them."

"Love and hatred are merely two sides of the same coin of obsession."

"Civilization is nothing but a thin veneer over humanity's true nature."

"The pen truly is mightier than the sword, especially when used theatrically."

"One must never allow sentiment to interfere with one's carefully laid plans."

"Attempted murder? Now honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Prize for attempted chemistry?"

"The path to righteousness is often paved with good intentions, though mine are merely paved with corpses."

"Education is the cornerstone of civilization, though I confess mine was rather interrupted by prison."

"One must appreciate the finer things in life, even when one is incarcerated."

"Revenge is a dish best served cold, preferably with a well-timed rake in the face."

"The human spirit is remarkably resilient, much like a well-constructed bear trap."

"Art and violence need not be mutually exclusive endeavors."

"Hope springs eternal, though so do my escape attempts."

"Time is but a construct, easily suspended by careful planning and explosives."

"Friendship is a bond that transcends bars, walls, and judicial restraints."

"The pursuit of knowledge knows no bounds, as does my pursuit of Homer Simpson."

"Family is everything, particularly when one has nothing else."

"Success is measured not in dollars, but in the tears of one's enemies."

"Love is blind, much like the guards who fail to see my escape plans."

"Patience is a virtue I have cultivated over many years of careful plotting."

"The truth, while often painful, is essential to understanding one's purpose."

"Freedom is the most precious gift, which is why I work tirelessly to achieve it."

"Peace comes to those who make it, often violently."

"Nature teaches us harsh lessons about survival and adaptation."

"Music has the power to soothe the savage beast, though I remain largely unsoothed."

"Science and reason are humanity's greatest achievements, after Shakespeare, of course."