Sterling Archer

"Who are you and what have you done with my life?"

"That's not irony, that's just bad luck."

"I've made a lot of mistakes, but that wasn't one of them."

"Your optimism is almost admirable."

"I don't believe in luck, I believe in skill."

"That's just your insecurity talking."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

"You're not as smart as you think you are."

"I've seen worse, but not much."

"That's not a compliment, by the way."

"I'm not saying you're stupid, but you're not smart."

"You've got to be kidding me."

"I'd love to help, but I've got other things to do."

"That's so typical of you."

"I'm done with this conversation."

"You know what? Fine. Whatever."

"I didn't ask for your opinion."

"That's barely legal."

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

"You're making this too complicated."

"I don't do regrets, I do consequences."

"That's not how I remember it."

"I'm not your therapist."

"You should probably run."

"This is either brilliant or incredibly stupid."

"I've been in worse situations."

"That's a terrible idea and I'm in."

"You're welcome, by the way."

"I didn't think you had it in you."

"That's going to hurt."