Ted Baxter

"Justice is getting exactly what you deserve - in my case, adoration."

"Kindness is a wonderful quality that I practice when people recognize my talent."

"Fear is something other people feel when they meet me."

"Power comes to those with the right jawline and conviction."

"Health is wealth, and I invest heavily in my appearance."

"Family is important, but not as important as my career."

"Freedom means having the liberty to be as wonderful as I am."

"Nature is beautiful, but not as beautiful as what I see in the mirror."

"Technology is great for showing off my good side."

"History will remember Ted Baxter as the greatest anchorman ever."

"Philosophy teaches us that I am, therefore I am fabulous."

"Literature is wonderful, especially when it's about me."

"Politics is fascinating, though usually I'm too focused on the camera."

"War is terrible, but I look good reporting on it."

"Motivation comes from within, as does my need for validation."

"Inspiration strikes when you believe in yourself as much as I do."

"Relationships work best when people recognize your superiority."

"Solitude gives me time to appreciate my own company."

"The greatest investment is investing in yourself - which I do constantly."

"I've discovered that life rewards those with my combination of looks and confidence."

"Love at first sight exists - usually when people meet me."

"Courage is facing the camera and believing every word you say."

"I find that happiness follows handsome men with good hair."

"The beauty of life is that I'm in it."

"Real friends are those who overlook your flaws - I'm still looking for mine."

"A good leader knows when to delegate - I delegate thinking to others."

"Money matters less when you have what I have."

"Change is inevitable, but my hairstyle is eternal."

"Wise men listen more than they speak - but I'm not that wise."

"Imagination is wonderful, especially when imagining my future success."