Zoidberg

"That's the kind of gratitude I deserve."

"I'm gonna make something of myself!"

"The creative process is mysterious and beautiful."

"I believe in justice, unless it's against me."

"Patience is a virtue I don't possess."

"I'm stronger than I think I am."

"That's all the inspiration I need!"

"Why must I be a self-loathing crustacean?"

"I'm going to the bathroom. I expect to be gone for some time."

"Wha- whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop!"

"I've always wondered if there was something wrong with me, but neurology is not an exact science."

"Now I'm gonna practice my decision-making."

"I'm sorry, I have to return some videotapes."

"What if I told you I was once captain of a spaceship?"

"My stomach may think my throat's been cut, but I refuse to believe it."

"Is the Professor a good listener? I suppose he would be if I ever got the chance to talk about my feelings."

"With my last ounce of strength, I shall do this task."

"I'm going to try love!"

"Oh no! Of all the qualities to possess, weasel-like behavior is the worst."

"Good news everyone! Death might make an appearance."

"Why does my love life mirror my academic performance?"

"I shall try to appreciate the finer things in life."

"What good is money if I can't impress a woman?"

"I'm afraid I can't do that. Wait, I can do that!"

"Sometimes you have to embrace your true nature, even if it's unpleasant."

"Does anyone want to go on an adventure? Please say yes."

"I've discovered that disappointment is my closest friend."

"Is there any hope for a creature as pathetic as myself?"

"I'm not a robot, but sometimes I wish I were."

"A creature of my talents is wasted in this kitchen."