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"Technology is better than people in every way."

"Imagination is what I use to picture better friends."

"Adventure usually just means something going wrong."

"Health-wise, my stress levels are your fault."

"Money would solve most of my problems, namely you."

"Power is the only thing worth having."

"Fear is just rational concern about the future."

"I'm stronger than all of you combined, intellectually at least."

"Kindness is wasted on the undeserving."

"Patience is a virtue I don't possess."

"Justice would be all of you having to think before speaking."

"Creativity is the only thing separating us from complete mediocrity."

"I'm grateful for nothing, which is realistic."

"Perseverance is just stubbornness with better marketing."

"Honestly, death might be preferable at this point."

"Beauty is wasted on people who can't appreciate it."

"Humor is my defense against complete despair."

"My dreams don't include any of you in them."

"Work would be fine if I didn't have to work with people."

"A real leader would abandon this group immediately."

"I have faith in nothing, and it's never let me down."

"Music at least has the courtesy to be organized."

"Science proves that you're all genetic mistakes."

"Art is the only thing worth doing, everything else is filler."

"Nature is beautiful because it doesn't talk back."

"Peace is a myth perpetuated by people who've never met you guys."

"Freedom would be not being stuck with any of you."

"The truth is that nobody knows what they're doing."

"Every moment with you people feels like wasted time."

"I have the knowledge, but I lack the patience to share it."