Sesame Street

"Work? The worst invention ever made."

"Leadership is telling people to go away."

"Faith is believing in things that won't happen."

"Music is noise. Loud, obnoxious noise."

"Science proves that everything is going wrong."

"Art is just fancy garbage."

"Nature is full of bugs and dirt. Disgusting."

"Peace is impossible with all these annoying people around."

"Freedom is being left alone to be miserable."

"The truth hurts, and I like that."

"Time moves too slowly when you're miserable."

"Knowledge is just more stuff to worry about."

"Education? A waste of valuable complaining time."

"Change is terrible. Everything should stay exactly the same."

"Courage is just another word for foolishness."

"Hope is for people who haven't given up yet."

"The best family is one that stays far away from you."

"Friends? I don't need friends. They're overrated."

"Success is having everyone leave you alone."

"Love? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard."

"If you want my advice, don't ask for it."

"Don't talk to me. I'm in a bad mood."

"A day without complaints is a day wasted."

"I'm not grouchy, I'm just honest."

"Life is too short to be nice."

"Why does everyone always want to bother me?"

"Scram! Beat it! Get outta here!"

"I love trash. It's the best thing in the whole world."

"Solitude teaches you who you really are beneath the performance."

"Relationships either grow or die. Stagnation is impossible."