The Mary Tyler Moore Show

"The truth is often hard to accept, like how perfect I am."

"Time flies when you're having fun looking at yourself."

"Knowledge is knowing when to deflect to someone else."

"The more educated you are, the more you appreciate me."

"Change is constant, but my looks are forever."

"It takes courage to be this good-looking and humble about it."

"Hope springs eternal, especially when you look like me."

"Parents just don't understand how to style themselves like I do."

"Friends stick by you; I stick by my moisturizer."

"Success smells like victory and expensive cologne."

"Happiness is knowing you're the smartest person in the room."

"I've always said: fake it till you make it—like my sincerity."

"Love at first sight? That's what happens every time someone sees me."

"Life's too short for bad hair days."

"The family that grooms together, stays together."

"Solitude gives me time to appreciate myself privately."

"Relationships work best when one person is clearly superior."

"Inspiration is easy when you've got what I've got."

"Motivation comes from believing in yourself as much as I believe in myself."

"War could be avoided if everyone just listened to me."

"Politics would be simpler if everyone had my sense of style."

"Literature is fine, but nothing compares to the story of my life."

"Philosophy is the love of wisdom; I just love myself."

"History will remember Ted Baxter as its most handsome anchor."

"Technology is great for broadcasting my best side."

"Imagination is wonderful, but nothing compares to reality: me."

"Adventure is out there, but I prefer it came to me."

"Health is important, but not as important as looking healthy."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a great suit."

"Power is knowing everyone's looking at you."