Politics Quotes

"American democracy has more than a little in common with a three-ring circus."

"Politics and comedy have one thing in common: everyone's got an opinion."

"A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now."

"Democracy is buying a majority with the money of the minority."

"Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even when there's no river."

"The art of politics is knowing what to say and when to shut up."

"I'm not a liberal. I'm a radical. Liberals want to improve the system. I want a new system."

"Politics is the struggle for whose values will guide society."

"A politician is someone who shakes your hand before an election and your confidence after."

"Elections are won by men and women chiefly because most of the voters don't think."

"America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without an intervening period of civilization."

"I once said that politics is show business for ugly people—I stand by that."

"The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about, unless you're a politician."

"The art of politics is knowing what not to say."

"The American Dream is a good concept, but it's been outsourced."

"The greatest trick of modern society is making us complicit in our own oppression."

"The problem with democracy is it gives voice to too many idiots."

"I'm trying to do something about the population problem. But if I advocate doing anything, they kill me."

"I looked up the word politics in the dictionary and it's actually a combination of two words: poli, which means many, and tics, which means small bloodsucking creatures."

"If someone brings up politics at a dinner table, I will come down hard against it."

"Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven't had one since William McKinley."

"Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair"

"This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the sun has stopped shining"

"In politics, stupidity is not a handicap."

"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it, and then misapplying the wrong remedies."

"A conservative is someone who believes in reform. As long as it don't cost nothing."

"I've been reading about the early Christian martyrs. Lots of Republicans in those stories."

"Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen."

"I once said, Carter's foreign policy is a Rorschach test, and you know what nobody understood that."

"Democracy is buying a majority with the money of the minority."