Deadpool

"Happiness is a warm gun, but also illegal, so settle for chimichangas."

"Time flies when you're having fun, and crawls when you're being murdered."

"The difference between you and me? I make killing look sexy."

"Wisdom is knowing when to shut up. I clearly lack this."

"Friendship is like a pair of gloves. Sometimes you lose one and don't care."

"Fear is just a four-letter word. Wait, that's four letters. I'm not good at math."

"Courage is not the absence of fear. It's fear wearing a really cool outfit."

"Change is like a bad haircut. It grows back, hopefully better."

"Education is important, but so is learning to use a sword properly."

"Knowledge is power, and power is corrupting, so stay ignorant."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy things that make you happy."

"Death and I have a complicated relationship. Mostly because I keep ruining it."

"Perseverance is just stubbornness with a good PR team."

"Gratitude is something I feel right before I stab someone."

"Creativity is intelligence having fun with sharp objects."

"Justice is what I call it when I'm the one doing the killing."

"Patience is a virtue I don't have time for."

"Kindness is my favorite hobby, right after killing people."

"Strength isn't about muscles. It's about how many people you can disappoint."

"Power corrupts, absolute power is pretty cool though."

"Health is just a slow way to die."

"Adventure is where I find the best excuses to hurt people."

"Imagination is the only limit, and I have none, so watch out."

"Music is the language of the soul. Mine speaks fluent violence."

"Faith is believing in things you can't see, like my dignity."

"Leadership is setting an example. Mine involves a lot of blood."

"Work is what you do to avoid dealing with your thoughts."

"Dreams are just nightmares with better PR."

"Hope is the thing with feathers. Mine exploded."

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and also in violence."