"Kindness is like napalm. It burns."Kindness
"I wonder what it's like to be happy."Happiness
"Vengeance is a dish best served anonymously."Justice
"You know what they call alternative medicine that works? Medicine."Wisdom
"I'm touching myself tonight."Humor
"Every hypocrite dies. I'll be here laughing."Humor
"I'm in love. It's better than drugs."Love
"Change or die. Those are literally your only options."Change
"History is written by the victors. Luckily, I'm very victorious."History
"I have a philosophy: never say never, always say somethere."Philosophy
"Persistence is key. Also bullets."Perseverance
"I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way."Art
"Thank you, brain, for all your efforts."Gratitude
"I'm listening. I'm just not paying attention."Humor
"Peace is for people who don't like violence."Peace
"I believe in personal growth. Mostly explosive growth."Education
"Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy avocados."Money
"Health is wealth. Also, tacos."Health
"I dream of being the world's greatest lover."Dreams
"Your fear is my favorite comedy."Fear
"I'm not a hero. I'm not a villain. I'm just handsome."Humor
"Knowledge is power. Guns are more powerful."Knowledge
"Work hard, play harder, kill hardest."Work
"Technology is great until robots try to kill you."Technology
"Music soothes the savage beast. Duct tape works too."Music
"Leadership is taking the hit so others don't have to."Leadership
"Success is when preparation meets opportunity and gunfire."Success
"I have a secret. I'm kind of awesome."Humor
"Imagination is the only limit. Well, that and bullets."Imagination
"Every villain is a hero in his own mind."