"Time flies when you're miserable."Time
"The truth? Nobody wants to hear it."Truth
"Freedom means getting to leave work early. That's all I want."Freedom
"Peace is just silence before someone ruins it."Peace
"Nature? I prefer air conditioning."Nature
"Art is a waste of office space."Art
"Science can't explain why I'm still here."Science
"Music is just noise with a beat."Music
"Faith is for people who can't accept reality."Faith
"A leader is someone who makes bad decisions with confidence."Leadership
"Work is what keeps me from thinking about my life."Work
"Dreams are what keep you from succeeding."Dreams
"Humor is the only way to survive this place."Humor
"Beauty is on the inside, which is unfortunate for most people."Beauty
"Death is probably the best thing that could happen to me."Death
"Perseverance is just stubbornness wearing a fancy hat."Perseverance
"Gratitude? For what?"Gratitude
"Creativity is overrated. Just follow the rules."Creativity
"Justice is whatever the boss decides it is."Justice
"Patience is a virtue I don't have."Patience
"Kindness is just manipulation you feel good about."Kindness
"Strength is knowing when to give up."Strength
"Fear keeps you honest about what matters."Fear
"Power corrupts, and I have none, so I'm pure evil."Power
"Money makes the world go round, and I don't have enough of it."Money
"Health is just a slow way to die."Health
"Adventure is for people with nothing to lose."Adventure
"Imagination is what gets you fired in the real world."Imagination
"Technology is ruining everything."Technology
"History repeats itself because humans are stupid."History