Tom Tucker

"The key to happiness is controlling the narrative."

"I'm living proof that good looks can take you anywhere."

"Success is measured in ratings and compliments."

"I don't follow trends - I am the trend."

"You can't spell 'excellent' without an 'excellent' hair gel."

"Perseverance is key, especially when perfecting your tan."

"Real men wear foundation."

"I'm not vain - I'm just accurately assessing my superiority."

"The best time to focus on yourself is always."

"Friendship is overrated when you're this fabulous."

"Knowledge is power, but a great suit is more powerful."

"I've anchored my hopes on one thing: me."

"Courage is facing the camera with total confidence."

"Education is important, but charm gets you further."

"The path to peace is through a good moisturizer."

"Adventure is just a rating opportunity waiting to happen."

"I'm not egotistical - I'm just accurate."

"Money is nice, but I'd give it all up for... myself."

"Health is wealth, and my abs are worth millions."

"I believe in the power of positive thinking and positive lighting."

"Dreams do come true if you're as determined as I am."

"Inspiration comes from looking in the mirror every morning."

"Relationships work best when there's distance between you and everyone else."

"I prefer solitude - it gives me more time to look fabulous alone."

"Art is subjective, but my face is objectively perfect."

"Technology changes, but good hair gel is forever."

"History will remember me as incredibly handsome."

"Politics aside, I'm the most important story in this town."

"Gratitude is important - I'm grateful for my existence daily."

"Patience is a virtue I don't need because I'm already perfect."