Cheers

"Technology won't replace human judgment—thank God for that."

"Imagination is what gets you through days with impossible customers."

"Adventure is what you call it when your plans fall apart spectacularly."

"Health is wealth, unless you're wealthy enough to buy better health care."

"Money isn't everything, but it beats poverty by a mile."

"Power without responsibility is just luck, and I make my own luck."

"Fear of failure is just fear of being like everyone else."

"Strength is standing alone when everyone else caves."

"Kindness is often mistaken for weakness by people who are actually stupid."

"Patience is a test I'm actively failing."

"Justice is a luxury most people can't afford."

"Creativity is turning your problems into jokes everyone can laugh at."

"Gratitude is nice, but recognition is better."

"Perseverance is doing the same thing and expecting different results, which is insanity."

"Death is nature's way of saying your lease is up."

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and my beholder is very critical."

"Humor is how you survive life without killing everyone around you."

"Dreams are nice, but paying bills is nicer."

"Work is just a series of irritations with paydays in between."

"Leadership is making people do what you want while they think it was their idea."

"Faith in humanity is something I lost years ago."

"Music soothes the soul, but sarcasm soothes mine better."

"Science explains the how; I explain the why you're being an idiot."

"Art is whatever makes you feel something, even if that something is rage."

"Nature's indifferent to your problems, unlike me—I'm actively hostile to them."

"Peace is the absence of drama, which is why I'll never have it."

"Freedom means not answering to anyone but your own conscience."

"Truth is brutal, and I'm a brutal person."

"Time moves slower when you're stuck behind the bar with drunk idiots."

"Knowledge without common sense is just useless trivia."