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"I may not be the smartest guy in the room, but I'm not stupid."

"You can't run from your past. You have to face it."

"Education is the most powerful weapon you can have."

"People don't change. They just become more themselves."

"I'm a very capable person."

"Life is what happens while you're waiting for it to happen."

"If you love something, set it free. But also give it your number."

"Sometimes the hardest thing to do is admit you were wrong."

"Friendship is just another word for people who annoy you less than others."

"I don't need to be anything other than what I already am."

"You know what the problem with the world is? Everyone wants to be special. Nobody wants to be normal."

"The only difference between me and a homeless person is two weeks."

"Study groups are a scam invented by Big Study to sell more highlighters."

"I'm going to be honest with you: I have no idea what I'm doing."

"You can't just skip ahead to the next thing. Life is about the journey, not the destination."

"I'm not a moron. I'm only a Pop-Tart addict."

"Politics is just business with better speeches."

"I read literature to sound intelligent at dinner parties."

"Philosophy is what people study when they can't do business."

"History teaches us that the winners get to decide what's true."

"Technology is wonderful, especially tax software."

"My imagination has made me a lot of money in real estate."

"Adventure is better when you can return to comfort."

"Health is important; looking healthy is more important."

"I'd tell you my secrets, but they're worth too much."

"Power is best when no one sees it coming."

"Fear is just a negotiating tactic."

"My strength comes from knowing exactly who I am: superior."

"Kindness is a luxury for the wealthy."

"I don't have patience; I have assistants."