Rick and Morty

"Health is just slow-motion dying with better PR."

"Money is quantified desperation."

"Power is getting others to want what you want."

"Fear keeps you alive longer than courage ever will."

"Strength is accepting you're weak and acting anyway."

"Kindness is inefficient resource allocation."

"Patience is cowardice disguised as virtue."

"Justice is whatever narrative wins the argument."

"Creativity is making new mistakes instead of repeating old ones."

"Gratitude is appreciating your cage."

"Perseverance is just repetitive failure with optimism."

"Death is the only honest ending."

"Beauty standards are just tyranny with better lighting."

"Dreams are your subconscious admitting defeat."

"Work is what keeps you from thinking about how you're dying."

"Leadership is the art of making others follow your mistakes."

"Science fiction is where scientists go to cry."

"Art without intention is just accidents that sold well."

"War is just economics with different methods."

"Freedom is the burden of unlimited choice."

"The only constant is that everything gets worse."

"Family dinners are the worst meetings of your life."

"Progress is just failure that eventually worked."

"Intelligence without empathy is just cruelty with a degree."

"The universe is mostly empty space, like human relationships."

"Happiness is a scam invented by retail companies."

"You either evolve or you die, there's no in between."

"Friendship is dependence with a cute name."

"I don't go to meetings, Morty. Meetings are for people who can't handle the chaos."

"Truth is relative to who's doing the talking."