Humor Quotes

"Being perfect is exhausting, but I make it look easy."

"Humor helps us through the toughest times."

"Laughter is the cure for the heaviest hearts."

"Humor is the armor that shields us from despair."

"Laughter is the best medicine, unless you're actually sick."

"Laughter shared is better than laughter alone."

"Humor helps us through difficult times."

"Life is more fun when you don't take yourself too seriously."

"Why, it's enough to drive one to homicidal mania!"

"The heart of comedy lies in causing genuine suffering to one's enemies."

"Humor is the best medicine, except when you're this obsessed with your boss."

"Comedy is tragedy plus time, and I've had plenty of both."

"Eesh, look at the size of that thing. Must be compensating for something."

"Our lives are like a bad sitcom - nobody's laughing."

"We're not bitter, we're just well-seasoned by experience."

"Laughter is the best medicine for everything except our lives."

"The best times are when we're smoking and complaining together."

"Two heads are better than one, but our husbands have none."

"Our lives are like a bad episode of a worse show."

"We've learned to find humor in the darkest places."

"Rest? But I'm not tired. I'm just gonna close my eyes for a moment."

"Twenty-three skidoo!"

"A gun. Why didn't I think of that?"

"Stupid flanders!"

"The ring came off my pudding can. Take my pen knife, my good man."

"I went to the police academy. It took three months and they even let me graduate."

"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel."

"Mmm... a shotgun."

"I'm gonna shoot this guy. I mean, hello, he's a guy!"

"You better start believing in ghosts, because you're in one!"