"Education teaches you things that make the world worse."Education
"Knowledge would be better if it were optional."Knowledge
"Time flies when you're not having fun. Excellent."Time
"Change is terrible. Status quo is the way."Change
"Dreams keep you awake at night. No thanks."Dreams
"The truth is everyone's annoying."Truth
"Freedom means nobody bothering you for a whole day."Freedom
"Peace is the sound of everyone leaving me alone."Peace
"Nature would be better without people trampling through it."Nature
"Art expresses feelings. Mine express: go away."Art
"Science explains the world. The world is bad."Science
"Music is lovely when played at someone else's house."Music
"Faith in what? Misery? I've got plenty."Faith
"Leadership is not yelling at everyone to scram."Leadership
"Work is tolerable in silence."Work
"Money can't buy happiness, which is perfect."Money
"Health advice is unsolicited and annoying."Health
"Adventure is what I'm actively avoiding."Adventure
"Imagination makes people optimistic. Ugh."Imagination
"Technology connects people. I hate people."Technology
"History proves grouches existed long before I did."History
"Philosophy without pessimism is just optimism."Philosophy
"Literature is better read alone without discussion."Literature
"Politics is everyone trying to run everyone else's life."Politics
"War is an extension of argument. Both are terrible."War
"Motivation is what ruins a perfectly good day off."Motivation
"Inspiration is overrated and unrequested."Inspiration
"Relationships require compromise. I don't compromise."Relationships
"Solitude isn't lonely when you prefer it."Solitude
"My vocabulary is limited: go away."Humor