Senor Chang

"Nature is beautiful only when it serves my purposes."

"Art without an audience is just therapy."

"Science bends to whoever has the biggest budget."

"Music speaks to the soul, which I rented out long ago."

"Faith is the fantasy of the frightened."

"Leadership is a burden only the narcissistic embrace."

"Work is where you trade your life for money."

"Dreams are just sleep's way of showing you your failures."

"Humor masks the void within."

"Beauty fades, but my contempt is eternal."

"Death is the only honest teacher."

"Perseverance is just refusing to accept defeat gracefully."

"Gratitude is a weakness dressed up as virtue."

"Creativity is rearranging what already exists."

"Justice is whatever I say it is."

"Patience is for people waiting for something better."

"Kindness is the weapon of the weak."

"Money doesn't talk, it screams, and I'm listening."

"Health is just a temporary reprieve from death."

"Adventure is boredom with a better story."

"Technology is progress only if it profits me."

"History repeats because humans never learn."

"Philosophy is just navel-gazing with big words."

"Literature is where people hide their secrets."

"Politics proves that evil is well-organized."

"War is politics by other means, and politics is my war."

"Motivation is the carrot dangling before the donkey."

"Inspiration is just stolen brilliance repackaged."

"Relationships are battlegrounds, and I never lose."

"Solitude is where I plot my return to power."