Tom Haverford

"The best leaders inspire others to be their best."

"Work should be enjoyable. If it's not, you're doing it wrong."

"Dreams don't come true by themselves. You have to make them happen."

"Humor is the best medicine. Medicine and money are the second and third best."

"Beauty fades, but a good personality lasts forever. Just kidding, my looks are forever."

"I don't think about death. Death isn't real if you don't acknowledge it."

"Perseverance is the difference between winners and losers."

"Be grateful for what you have, even if you want more."

"I'm constantly creating the life I want to live."

"Justice is ensuring that people get what they deserve."

"I'm learning patience. Slowly."

"Kindness is underrated. That said, I'm mostly looking out for number one."

"My strength is my ability to dream bigger than anyone else."

"I embrace change because change means opportunity for me."

"The most important thing is to enjoy the journey, not just the destination."

"I'm not just hoping for the best. I'm planning for it."

"I'm going to live forever, or die trying."

"Treat yo self."

"I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode."

"Life is short. Eat dessert first."

"I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life."

"Success is 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration, but also 100% confidence."

"Why do people have to die? Why can't they just stay alive forever?"

"I have the most beautiful smile in the world, and I've worked very hard to maintain it."

"Everything I do is the best thing I've ever done."

"I want to make it crystal clear: I am awesome."

"You know what my favorite word is? Mine."

"I'm like an impala: fast, sleek, and you want to hunt me."

"When I make a decision, it's final. Like when I decide something is cool."

"I once worked at a restaurant called Threepeat Pizza."