Family Guy

"Change is inevitable, kind of like bankruptcy and disappointment."

"Courage isn't the absence of fear; it's being terrified and doing it anyway."

"Hope is what keeps us going when everything else has failed us."

"True friendship means standing by someone even when they've made terrible life choices."

"Success is 10% inspiration and 90% not getting caught."

"Family is the people who have to love you, whether they like it or not."

"I've learned that money can't buy happiness, but it can buy things that make you forget you're unhappy."

"The key to happiness is lowering your expectations. Works every time."

"You know, relationships are all about communication... and by that I mean avoiding it."

"Life is like a box of chocolates, except I ate all of them and now I'm in debt."

"I'm not a doctor, but I play one in my imagination."