Family Guy

"Sometimes the greatest gifts in life come from hard work and dedication."

"Chris, you're the man of the house now. That means you gotta do man things."

"I'm gonna go get a beer."

"Hehehehe, he said 'duty'."

"I'm not a smart man."

"You know what really grinds my gears?"

"This is almost as bad as the time I tried to use a hammer to hang a picture and ended up in the hospital."

"Holy crap!"

"Sweet mother of macadamia nuts!"

"Lois, Lois! Hey, Lois! Check it out."

"I'm gonna go have a cigarette right now. You want a smoke? You don't smoke, do you, right?"

"All right!"

"Giggity!"

"That's freakin' sweet!"

"Shut up, Meg."

"My inspiration comes from rock bottom."

"I motivate people to feel better about themselves."

"I'm collateral damage in life's war."

"Politics ignores unpopular girls."

"I relate to tragic literature more than happy stories."

"Philosophy can't explain why I exist."

"History won't record this moment, nor should it."

"The internet proved people worldwide think like my town."

"My imagination created an escape that doesn't exist."

"Adventure is for characters in better shows."

"My mental health depends on accepting reality."

"Money can't buy friends who actually like you."

"Powerlessness is my natural state."

"Fear of rejection is redundant. I'm always rejected."

"My strength is in accepting my weakness."