Parks and Recreation

"Gratitude is thanking someone who bought you a drink."

"I don't do perseverance. I do whatever's fun right now."

"Music is life. Music and also partying."

"Health is just the slowest way to die."

"Power is knowing the bouncer at every club in town."

"Fear is just weakness leaving the body through loud screaming."

"Strength comes from partying harder than everyone else."

"Kindness is for people with nothing better to do."

"Relationships are temporary, but the memory of crazy nights is forever."

"The path to success is paved with bad decisions and no regrets."

"Work is something other people do."

"Hope is what people have when they're out of money."

"Family is important, but have you met my party friends?"

"You want advice? Here's mine: don't take advice from anyone."

"I believe in living life without a plan. Plans are for sad people."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it can rent it for the weekend."

"Art is subjective, which is why my life is a masterpiece."

"Nature is cool, but has anyone been to a nightclub?"

"Peace is boring. Give me chaos."

"Freedom is doing donuts in the parking lot at 3 AM."

"The truth is whatever feels good in the moment."

"Time is just a construct, man. Live like it's midnight forever."

"Education is for people who want to limit their potential."

"Change is for people who are afraid of staying the same."

"Friendship means never having to say you're broke. Wait, that's not how it goes."

"Real courage is wearing a sequined jacket to a formal event."

"The key to happiness is not caring what anyone thinks about you."

"You gotta live fast because you might die tomorrow. Or today. Whatever."

"Success is when people know your name and buy you drinks."

"Love is just another word for doing whatever you want with someone else."