Peanuts

"I have deep feelings of anguish and great doubts about myself."

"Winning isn't everything, but losing isn't anything."

"I have a new philosophy. I only dread one day at a time."

"You know, I think larceny is my game."

"I've done it again. I've really done it this time."

"My stomach hurts."

"I can't stand it. I just can't stand it."

"Isn't there anyone who knows what Christmas is all about?"

"I'm a blockhead."

"Why is it that everything I do turns out wrong?"

"Rats! I missed again."

"I got a rock."

"Good grief!"

"That's the most delusional thing I've heard."

"I'm always right, and you know it."

"You're hopelessly confused, as usual."

"Stop complaining and take action."

"That's the worst decision you could make."

"You need professional help - like mine."

"I've decided I hate everyone equally."

"That will be five cents - cash only."

"You're hopeless, absolutely hopeless."

"That's completely irrational."

"I'm not criticizing, I'm analyzing."

"You need a reality check, blockhead."

"That's the dumbest reasoning I've heard all week."

"I don't have time for nonsense."

"You're your own worst problem."

"That's pathetic, even for someone like you."

"I'm simply pointing out obvious facts."