Humor Quotes

"I've made worse decisions than this."

"This is the dumbest thing we've done all week."

"I'm always right. You just take longer to realize it."

"You know what they call a Royale with Cheese? No wait, that's not me."

"Ehehehehe, giggity!"

"Shut up, Meg."

"I've learned to laugh at myself before others do."

"I've learned to find humor in tragedy."

"Giggity!"

"Laughter is the best medicine, giggity goo."

"I've never met a mirror I didn't like."

"You can't spell 'excellent' without an 'excellent' hair gel."

"I'm not egotistical - I'm just accurate."

"I'm not shallow - I have depth in my vanity."

"I'm proof that arrogance works."

"I'm not judgmental - I just judge everyone as inferior."

"I'm not conceited - I'm just concurrently observing my perfection."

"The world needs more people like me - attractive and talented."

"I'm not a moron. I'm only a case or two away from it."

"M as in Mancy."

"Phrasing!"

"That's what she said."

"Are we not doing phrasing anymore?"

"That's basically heroin."

"My drinks are empty. How is that possible?"

"What? I'm charming."

"What are you, twelve?"

"And we're back to the drinking."

"Clearly you've never met me."

"Are you serious right now?"