Humor Quotes

"Relationships are like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park."

"I'm not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?"

"Why would anyone ever eat anything other than breakfast food?"

"Everyone is terrible except me."

"That's what she said."

"I'm equally angry at all of you."

"You know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris? Me neither."

"I've always been a big fan of myself."

"I'm an idiot, probably."

"This is my fault somehow."

"This is the worst day of my life, and it's only 10 AM."

"I've made a huge mistake."

"Why would you think I could handle this?"

"I can't believe I'm this stupid."

"I've already ruined it, haven't I?"

"I've done it again, haven't I?"

"I'm the worst person in this room."

"What did I do wrong now?"

"I'm sorry for existing."

"This is my chance to ruin something else."

"I'm incapable of doing anything correctly."

"This will definitely be my legacy."

"I've completely humiliated myself."

"I'm the most pathetic person alive."

"This is the worst possible outcome."

"Why can't I do anything right?"

"This is going to be the death of me."

"I've completely blown it again."

"I'm the most unlucky person ever."

"I can't believe I'm still alive."