Humor Quotes

"I'm like a human Starbucks. I don't have a clue how to function without caffeine."

"I talk fast because my brain moves faster than my mouth can handle."

"Coffee is the most important meal of the day."

"I thrive on chaos and coffee."

"I believe in the power of a good laugh and better friends."

"I'm not a blonde, I'm a problem-solver with excellent hair."

"Sarcasm is my first language, truth is my second."

"Humor is how I cope with seeing the worst."

"I don't do humility."

"I laugh at people's suffering because it's funny."

"You're an idiot."

"But you've got such a lovely bottom."

"I need coffee to function. Is that a problem?"

"I view humanity as a game to be won."

"It's pretty much how I get through life - by making jokes and taking nothing seriously."

"The most important thing is to have a drink in your hand."

"A man who doesn't drink is a man with no stories."

"A gentleman always knows when to exit gracefully."

"Humor is the best defense against reality."

"Humor is essential, but never at the expense of dignity."

"Revenge is a dish best served with proper etiquette."

"Humor can heal even the deepest wounds."

"I need coffee in an IV drip."

"I'm not a morning person, but coffee makes everything better."

"Laughter is the best medicine. That and coffee."

"Humor is just tragedy with better timing."

"Humor is my shield against everything else."

"Humor helps us cope with life's difficulties."

"Sometimes the funniest moments come from the most difficult times."

"Veronica Mars, Girl Detective – it has a nice ring to it."