Humor Quotes

"Sometimes the best thing you can do is laugh at yourself."

"I'm on fire! And I mean that literally."

"I'm gonna do to you what Limp Bizkit did to music in the late 90s."

"Sometimes I just do whatever the voices say."

"The key to a great Maxim shoot is just pretending the camera is a human being."

"I love the smell of napalm in the morning... or is that just my apartment?"

"I will say that staying a virgin is way harder than I thought."

"Great, a fourth wall break inside a fourth wall break... that's like, within a dream."

"The only thing standing between you and success is me... with this sword."

"I will finally be able to achieve what I've always wanted: to die painfully."

"I'm sorry, were you expecting someone with a face? Too bad."

"I have an image to uphold. People are counting on me to be irresponsible and stupid."

"Humor is my defense mechanism."

"I'm gonna make you so wet, you'll feel like a slip and slide."

"I'm Batman."

"I'm not the guy to do your laundry and remember to take out the trash."

"I'm better with a drink in my hand."

"I'm just your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man."

"Everybody loves a guy in a onesie."

"Puny god."

"Humor is the best medicine for a troubled soul."

"With great power comes great responsibility... just kidding, I have no idea what I'm doing."

"I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am."

"I need a strong drink and a steak the size of a car."

"I've been called many things, but genius is my favorite."

"I deserve a drink."

"Bugs are not the best things to eat, but they're still pretty good"

"Heavens to Murgatroyd!"

"Laughter has its place, even in serious times."

"Puny god."